Look, I know you think she was the one, but I don't. Now, I think you're just remembering the good stuff. Next time you look back, I, uh, I really think you should look again.

Thank you 500 days of Summer.

This makes so much sense.

More Francine Rivers

"One of life's greatest tragedies is watching a relationship unravel over something that could have been resolved over one intelligent, adult conversation."

"Sometimes we find ourselves caught up in currents and carried along where we don't want to go. Then we find out later that God's hand was in it all along."


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I will post more quotes as I read along her novels, but so far, she is being a strong voice of reason for me, and God is using her to fill some holes in my heart.

Redeeming Love

It will never cease to amaze me those moments when you truly realize that God has a hand in everything you do, even when you don't see til afterward. What a feeling to catch a glimpse of that.

Though I have owned this book for about 3-4 years, I didn't even open the front cover. I see why now: God wasn't ready for me to read it. It wouldn't have spoken to me the way it did now.

Why did I walk into my closet the other day and grab it? Boredom? No, about halfway through this book, I knew there was a reason.

I knew God's hand had lead me to it, not of my own will, but of his.

What an empowering feeling to feel God guide your hand, and for him to speak to you in such a booming voice.

Wow.

Weakness

Just when I feel like I've gotten up the courage to say the things I need to say and cut off ties if necessary...

We get together and things feel right and all that goes down the drain for another day.

The Heart

The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it? Jeremiah 17:9

"Humans do have a knack of choosing precisely those things that are worst for them." - Albus Dumbledore

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Ha, here I go again with the Dumbledore quotes, but seriously his words are wise if you catch them.

Why did God make our hearts deceitful? It is quite a pain to deal with, especially when our brains contradict our hearts. Our feelings are so immensely strong sometimes that it is so easy to be blinded and not see the big picture. I'm not even saying I can see the bigger picture yet, but I'm sure that at this point my heart is deceiving me.

It screams not to let go, not to give up, to hold on to the possibility of reconciliation... of happiness, but alas, my brain says Lyndsey, it's almost time to live and let go.

I intended to write more on this, but right now I'm not feeling it. For now, I just soak in these two quotes.

The Incredible Lessons of Albus Dumbledore

"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, remember that." - Albus Dumbledore (In Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)

I literally gasped when I read this.

It was like a slap in the face, like it was blinking red light that I was meant to read over and over and over.

I do believe that Dumbledore was one of the Jesus/God characters of Harry Potter, in his infinite wisdom and fatherly love over his pupils.

So saying that, these words have struck my heart and have become words to live by for me right now. Often times when we are hurting, we can only think of the dreams that aren't possible anymore or the dreams that have suddenly seemed so much further away and of course those facts can be considerably disheartening and dare I say even depressing, but in forgetting to live, we lose ourselves even more.

So in saying this, I will not let a hurting heart hold me back. I will take chances, I will go on an adventure, and I will stop playing it so safe.

I'm relunctantly embracing this change and I will not stop living, for God helps those who help themselves.

Thank you Professor Dumbledore. I look forward to finding more and more of your wise words as I once again reread Harry Potter.

Psalm 34:18-19

Unfortunately, in going through something like this, moments of sadness and hurt creep their way into your heart.

You don't know what triggers these moments and it's hard to make them go away. So when these moments hit me, I will read Psalm 34:18-19.

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. Psalm 34:18-19